Cobra Kai and Johnny Lawrence’s Backs Are Still Awesome – OutKick
Netflix’s Cobra Kai returned for season five on Friday, and in turn, so did Johnny Lawrence.
And it’s great.
If you’re unfamiliar, Lawrence (played by William Zabka) is the two-time All Valley Karate Champion (1982 and 1983). He’s also the current best character on TV/streaming.
If you like Coors banquet, classic 80s rock, and boobs (and who doesn’t?), you’ll find Lawrence as enjoyable as that morning pee you just woke up to.
Throughout the first four seasons of the hit show, Lawrence proved to be the liberals’ worst nightmare. He swears with the consistency of an NFL positional coach, gives cocky kids the ass kicks they deserve but never expect, and treats internet search engines the same as boys. 15 when they are home alone.
When a high school girl attempted to join Lawrence’s dojo early in the show’s season, Lawrence replied, “I appreciate you coming, but there are no girls at Cobra Kai.” When asked why not, Lawrence simply replied, “The same reason why there are no women in the military, it doesn’t make sense.
Lawrence is immune to cancel culture
At one point, he was shown some used cars to drive and he invaluably said to the car dealer (Daniel LaRusso): “A (Subaru) Forester? Do I look like a lesbian?
I admit that within the first five minutes of seeing Lawrence on screen in the first season of Cobra Kai, I was immediately hooked.
Maybe it’s because he once told his student to “change that ringtone, buy some Guns ‘N Roses or something.”
Anyway, my admiration only grew in the four seasons that followed. Gone are the memories of him and his friends dressed in Skelton punishing Daniel LaRusso in a high school bathroom. They were replaced by training montages of Lawrence knocking over residential mailboxes and wearing out a walkman.
There are also the headbands that feature so prominently in all five seasons of Netflix’s Cobra Kai. Think your Supreme shirt is cool? How about those too tight pants? Or those idiots from Crocs? Think again. Headbands are all the rage – assuming you kick ass.
Johnny Lawrence never disappoints
If you haven’t watched the first four seasons of Cobra Kai yet, well, you’ve got some catching up to do.
In the meantime, know that Lawrence is just a Netflix and relax, still kicking ass five years after the series premiered. The show’s fifth season (spoiler-free) kicks off with Lawrence continuing to live the American dream. He’s still living his best ’80s life: listening to Poison, following a strict convenience store diet, airbrushing a minivan cool, and (presumably) having sex with the hot girl from the apartment across the street.
Oh, and the reason Sensei Lawrence practices and teaches karate is to show the world that “you’re not a bunch of pansy-ass nerds.”
It’s hard to believe that someone as awesome as Lawrence resides in Los Angeles.